Wednesday, January 23, 2013

4 Months.

In a little more than 4 months I'll be graduating from high school.

Wow is just about all I can say.

Last night I worked my school's Night of Distinction. It's a nice little ceremony they have every year to commemorate the 8th graders who got scholarships and who will be attending Seton next year.

My friend Erin and I sat in the back of the ceremony, and all I could picture was me sitting up there exactly 4 years ago.

I got a scholarship. I went to my Evening of Distinction. I sat there nervous thinking about how I didn't know very many of the other girls. I was unsure about what lay ahead for me.

I stood, surrounded by a group of girls I barely knew, and smiled for this picture. Unknown to me at the time that I would later call a lot of these girls friends and that I would get to know every single one.

Four years ago, I only knew the girls I went to grade school with.

Four years ago, I didn't know all the good things that lay ahead. Four years ago, I didn't know that I would one day yearn to be able to do it all over again.

One of my friends gave a talk to the 8th graders, giving them advice, and sharing her high school experience. And it honestly brought tears to my eyes.

I get emotional when a new phase of life comes to a close. And her speech reminded me of all the good things I don't want to leave in four months.

All of the green weeks, Founder's Days, friendships formed, laughter, inside jokes, impossible tests, and amazing moments. I'm afraid to leave it all behind me.

I really thought it was interesting when she told the 8th graders that although they may not know the girls around them, they will spend countless hours and classes together over their next 4 years. And she is totally right. The girls at my Evening of Distinction are the ones I've had the most classes with. The most fun with. The most laughter with. And most of all, the most lifelong memories with.

The 8th graders are nervous and scared of what lies ahead for them in high school, but having almost finished it myself, I'm a little jealous of them. I wish I had another 4 years to laugh with the friends I've made. But I only have 4 months, which isn't a lot of time.

I hear about some of my friends and classmates talking about how they've been accepted to fancy, far-away colleges, and it makes me sad. I know they'll all have excellent times in college, and I know they all have bright futures ahead of them. But a little selfish part of me wishes that we could all just stay together and remain friends forever. So cliche - I know!

There have been days when I have been angry about a bad grade, mad about all the homework I have, or stressed about everything going on. There have been days when I have cried because I feel like the pressure is just too much.

But those days are few and far between. It is much more often that I leave school happy to have shared another day with sweet friends and classmates. That I have been excited about a good test grade, or simply thankful for a fun school day.

So although I may go to bed sad tonight (to be honest, I'm getting emotional just writing this post - ha!), I'll also be thankful for all the good times I've had over the past 4 years. Because if high school hadn't treated me well, I wouldn't be so sad to see it leave.

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