I feel like I have had a lot of time to think lately. I find my mind just wandering a lot about a bunch of different things.
But lately my mind has been guiding me towards thoughts of the past a lot.
And I've been feeling pretty nostalgic about it.
I have been thinking a LOT about high school and the steadily approaching college situation.
I feel like it's finally starting to sink in that I'm completely 100% done with high school. I'm never going back. I find myself reminiscing about high school stuff. I think about the teachers I may never see again. I smile a bit when I remember the way we used to joke around in so many of my classes. And then I start to get sad when I am reminded of all the incredibly sweet people who came into my life in the past four years.
It seems kind of unfair, you know?
I meet new people and make new friendships (some of which I only made in the past year or so), and now I feel like those relationships are being taken from me.
Sure, I'll stay in touch with high school friends over Facebook and Twitter and through Instagram and texting. But that's not the same.
Technology is nice, but it's no where close to being able to share real laughter with those people.
When I graduated, college still seemed kind of far away. I mean, three months is a decent amount of time. Everyone was talking about senior trips and graduation parties back then.
Now suddenly the topic of conversation has turned into class schedules, orientation, and move in dates. WHAT?!
Where did the time go? How is it that I only have about a month until some of my friends leave this state completely?
There are still things I want to do and memories I want to make before college starts.
The girls I ate lunch with this year want to get together for one last meal together. I am certainly excited for that, but a piece of me is sad about it at the same time. I know that when we walk away from that meal, there is a good chance that we'll never get back together for another one.
It's not that we aren't friends or that we will no longer get along. Instead, I have found that life often tends to get in the way of things a bit.
My grade school friends had wanted to get together one last time during the school year before we headed off to college, and that never happened.
People naturally grow apart, and I think that's what is making me so nostalgic.
There are people in my life now that I don't want to grow apart from.
I am afraid of the uncertainty that comes with the distance of college.
I admit that I don't have a TON of friends. But the friends I do have? They are real, and they have shown me what it means to be a friend. I've got a few quality friends, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
So the nostalgia has been creeping in as reality has finally hit me. I don't think it's going to go away super fast either. In fact, I think there will always be a little place in my heart that hurts a little bit when I think back on high school. Not because it was a hard, depressing time, but because it was so good that I didn't want to leave.
So for now I'm taking it one day at a time, and my time hasn't run out quite yet.
I'm praying for guidance and strength as I near a huge transitional time in my life.
I'm also praying that maybe, just maybe, this quote is true......