Thursday, May 10, 2012

Time


It's weird how time changes!

I wrote this post a while ago, and saved it in my drafts, but for some reason I just never got around to publishing it. I don't remember exactly when I wrote it, but I think it might have been in the fall - ha! I wanted to post it now, and then add my own comments onto the end of it!

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Lately, I feel like my life is going by in fast forward. However, at the same time, I feel like my life is on pause. Does that make any sense?

What I'm trying to say is that the "speed" of life is going so fast. I feel like the days and weeks are flying by without me even noticing. I feel as though I'm always too busy. I've always got something to do or work on. I honestly feel like I never have enough time in the day to accomplish everything.

On the other hand, life itself is on pause. I don't have much time to do things that I simply enjoy doing, mainly because I have so much homework to work on when I come home from school and babysitting. I've watched Grey's Anatomy for the last 4 years. It is my absolute favorite show! But I haven't seen a single episode this season because I don't have the time for it. I don't have a lot of time to blog, or watch movies, or even just simply relax.

I'm just getting exhausted and worn out!

I know that this is just a season in my life. I know that I won't always have to put the things I enjoy doing on pause in order to get school work done. I know that one of these days I'll look back on all of this and be happy that I put all of this time and effort into my school work. Some day, I'll enjoy looking back on this post to see where I was in this stage of my life.

I know that some day it will all be worth it because, to be honest, this season in my life has been crazy and hectic, like nothing I've ever experienced before.

But I know that it too will pass.

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I'm SO happy to say that as I type this sentence right now, this particular stressful "season" in my life is over. This crazy year that everyone says is so hard is almost done. Sure, I've got a few more exams and homework assignments to do, but today I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Today was my final exam for my last AP class. I've still got 2 more AP tests to take, but I've already studied for my finals, so I don't need to do anything more for those!

For the first time since probably August, I have absolutely no homework that I need to do for tomorrow. That is a glorious thing!

When I was re-reading that old post from above, I thought it would be forever until I understand how all the hard work was worth it, but I actually do now. I'm proud of myself that I was able to take on difficult classes and actually do well in them. Sure, it was stressful along the way, but hopefully I can get some college credit for it and be SO much better off in the long run.

For the first time in weeks (and maybe even months), I think I'm going to head home tonight, take a nice hot shower, watch a movie, and just relax. That sounds absolutely divine to me right now.

And, of course, I think I'll enjoy a few of these tonight because well, after a long year, I think I deserve it!

As weird as it sounds, I'm kind of thankful for this hard year because I feel like I have learned so much and really grown as a person. I feel much more equipped to handle senior year, college, and whatever comes after that. :)

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